I’ve been turning several things in my head for a few days, and I feel I must write them down.
Because I’m betting these are things that give you pause or quicken your pulse in a weird or obsessive way, too. And I’m thinking that committing them to pen and paper –if you will– might give me some perspective and make me feel less… insane.
1. Does it annoy anyone else when grown women regardless of sexual orientation refer to their close female acquaintances as "girlfriends"? Because to me it’s like nails on a chalkboard, and it makes me uncomfortable to a degree– especially in the deplorably ungrammatical "me and my girlfriends." No guy has ever felt the need to call his fellow friends who are also male "my guyfriends" –let alone "my boyfriends", mainly because usually the gender clarification is used when there may be a doubt as to who the friend is and not as a weird default. I guess that’s it: unless there is a specific situation in which you need to clarify your friend’s or friends’ genders (i.e. "My *girl* friend Chris just got a new guinea pig, and my other friend, Chris, said *he* hated guinea pigs, so they are no longer speaking to one another.")
2. Speaking of pets, let’s say that you’re a busy person and you run a busy household that includes a pet. And say you forget to bring in said pet from a car that was sitting outside, in the high heat. And the car’s windows were all closed. And let’s say the pet dies of suffocation. Does that make you a pet murderer or does it make you a sad victim because you lost your beloved pet? Does it make you a generally reliable person who just made a horrible mistake, or does it make you a person who is clearly so unreliable and grossly neglectful that said person should not be trusted with another pet? Should one call this person "Michael Vick" behind that person’s back, or is that inaccurate seeing as Michael Vick actually killed his animals knowingly?
3. Let’s say that you know someone relatively well. This person is constantly bringing up people in conversation whose acquaintance you’ve never made. And even after you admit to this person that, no, in fact, you do not know a person X, and no, you’ve never been introduced to person Y, and alas, you’ve never had the pleasure to meet person Z, your friend insists upon talking about them as if you and X, Y and Z went way back. Also, your acquaintance also likes to point out how cool/amazing/awesome/fascinating/thrilling/scintillating X, Y, and Z’s lives are and how deeply involved they are, even though you’ve never actually seen them together.
Is that annoying, or is it merely a point of jealousy because you wish you were as cool as, and as involved as your acquaintance is with X, Y and Z?
4. Do you ever get the feeling that even though you’re long out of high school, whenever things are at their least pleasant or perfect they seem to replay just like 9th grade? Is it because whenever things are not going well we revert to our insecure and immature selves, or is it that you cannot ever escape the person you were in your teens?
5. Is it really so wrong to start singing a musical theater tune out of the blue?
6. Do you ever get the urge to tell people exactly what you think about them, even if it means breaking a long friendship or familial relationship?
7. Do you ever wonder why it’s so hard to gather up that courage, even if the alternative is to have to deal with someone who unsettles you and makes you feel awful and unwanted inside?
8. I wish I could ask someone to forgive me for behaving horribly toward that person in the past. It’s that person’s birthday today, and I would like to issue a "happy birthday" wish. And, I’m so very sorry.
9. Am I the only person who keeps a tally of wrongs (and rights) in my head, and which comes back to haunt me in the wee hours of the morning on occasion?
Please, readers: don’t leave me hanging. Tell me if you can relate to any of the things I’ve written above –even #8.
Have a lovely rest of Tuesday, and I look forward to hearing from you.