A Daily Dose of Zen Sarcasm!

Aloha and Mahalo for the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a

Saying goodbye is something I’ve never particularly enjoyed.

I’m far too emotional– even if the experience kind of sucked or was not too much to write home about (or write a blog about, as the case may be), there is always a little bit of ineffable sadness associated with knowing that this time is the last time you will see someone or smell something or taste something else.

Even if that something happens to be the smell of rotting sewage, perhaps.

I must confess that of all the things I miss about California, the smell of rotting cow manure wafting from near the Moss Landing towers not only ranks dead last but was something I had not, until just now, thought of.

Of which I had not thought, until just now.  Ah, better.

Frankly, I am far too busy planning the demise of the very annoying six-year old whose mother cannot control him, who’s shrieking behind me.  I am also praying that little Herr Meow doesn’t make me eat my words in the airplane either.


This is my last entry written under the dubiously salubrious air of Honolulu.

In less than one hour, we’ll be airborne and flying east–perhaps to never return.

It is hard to say goodbye, and yet we’ve been waiting for this day pretty much since we arrived.

"Why oh WHY would anyone want to leave Honolulu," you might ask, half disgusted and wholly interested in what I’m about to write.  (Or at least, so I hope)

The reasons are far too complex, but it indirectly involves the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a debacle— item of which I was alerted thanks to alert reader Rev. Melz.

You see, that long ole word is the Hawaiian word for "triggerfish" and it’s a favorite among kids and the linguistically inclined –it’s a little like "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" but with a Polynesian flair.

And some of you might be in the know and go, "OMG yeah!  That’s the Hawaiian state fish!!!"

And you’re wrong, sort of.

The Hawaiian legislature is still debating that one.  Apparently the Humu WAS the state fish but not everyone thought it was good enough or exclusive enough to the Hawaiian islands to warrant being the state fish.  So now the bill that was to convert the Humu into the state fish expired and now there must be an obligatory waste of taxpayers’ money to discuss whether the Humu should actually BE the state fish, or whether the title should go to a worthier fish.  There are pro- and anti- Humu factions.  And the race is on… perhaps until the next bill expires and they have to do this thing all over again.

And so it goes. 

You may think, "well taxpayers’ dollars are wasted every day."

Or perhaps you think, "…..people LIVE in Hawaii?"

Or, "but that’s so quaint!"


I want to go back to a place where things are not dismissed as "quaint" or "loco charm."  There is much charm and beauty in these islands, for sure.  I cannot take that away from them.  But there are far too many people with their heads stuck up their ‘okoles (<–quaint term huh?) who simply care only about fattening their pockets, while the good people of Hawaii –numb from paying $8 for a gallon of orange juice– navigate around the lolo who broke down on H1 AGAIN and caused the 45 minute delay during rush hour; those who zip around the millions of badly-patched potholes in the city, avoid tourists turning into their lane recklessly, and try to make their daily living without giving much thought to the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a.

And this is why this goodbye is more sweet than bitter.  Califor-ny, here I come!

Aloha, Honolulu.  A hui hou.

This entry was published on February 25, 2006 at 4:10 am and is filed under E Huli Loa!, Soapboxing. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

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