Forgot to Turn It Off, originally uploaded by Madame Meow.
I'm snowed in today. No, not really: the snow was pretty enough, and it's cold enough never to want to step outside (with pardons to people who, after spending enough time in negative digits may think that 20 degrees Fahrenheit is sweater weather, naturally).
But you know, it's cozy in here. And I finally wanted to sit down and commit some thoughts to my little space. And it's a cramped space around here: I guess I never thought– or rather, never gave a thought– to the fact that motherhood of two is an entirely different game from motherhood of one.
Don't get me wrong: being mother to two is not exactly a burden, though there are burdensome moments. And it's not an ongoing flood of things to do, although when the little one is screaming and the big one decides it's the best thing in the world to go ahead and copy him and they both start banging their fists against whatever and then the cat decides to join them because, 'Hey! It's getting close to dinnertime' and so on, well… you start to get the picture.
Motherhood is already burden enough, even with all the loveliness it brings. It's a constant job in which the odds of needing something dry-cleaned at the end of the day are pretty damn good.
I can't seem to get the hang of juggling it all. I don't know how you working mothers and single mothers and stay-at-home mothers do it without sometimes wanting to lock yourself in the closet and screaming loudly or biting into whatever you can sink your teeth into first– preferably not a body part, because it's very weird to have to explain teeth marks to people.
The laundry is half-made and the room looks like a tornado hit it. The floor looks like a Hansel-and-Gretel crisscross of unnamed food objects. The living room is a dangerous minefield of popular children's tunes.
And I guess that's all okay, because this is what I signed up for when I thought it would be a good idea to let my DNA live on.
Anyway, here is a note from deep in the parenthood trenches. Does this make me a mommyblogger now?
LOVE the photo. Very cool. Lights are still on here, but after a redonkulously long trek through slippery sludge up to Salvation Army and back today, I think I’m turning mine off soon for a long winter’s nap.
Mommyblogger? Sure, by virtue of your adorable kidlets. But Blogger Par Excellence any day of the week. 🙂
*laughs* The secret is finding someplace where you can scream. Or at least have someone else look after the kids for a day and give yourself a break.
Sometimes a Mom needs a day off so she can relax and recharge. Back in our parents’ and grandparents’ days that was the benefit of having a lot of family members around. Someone was willing to spoil the kids for a day and give the parents a needed break. It’s harder to do that with how scattered our families have become but we all still need it.
I handled it by letting myself leave the house in a mess for a day or two once in a while. After all, it was only going to be clean for a short time and a break was too important to ignore.
Besides, the boys are old enough to learn to clean up their own messes. Just make it into a new game for them. 🙂
I hear ya, sister. 🙂
“I don’t know how you working mothers and single mothers and stay-at-home mothers do it”
I wanted to say “well, sometimes I lock myself in the closet and scream loudly”, but the real truth is that I constantly have to make myself STOP and focus on *the wonder* of the little person *right in front of me* and let go of the mess, noise, stress and bills. It’s often a deliberate thing. It works – but it takes effort. Maybe it comes more naturally to other women? Also, sometimes, I just hang in there until bedtime comes, and then I have a glass of wine and unknot. 😛
This is what closets and/or garages are for. Totally healthy (I hope)!
Thank you, all. Some days are better; some days, closets are necessary.